Black Monday

Yehey, naadd na rin ako sa blog na ito. And for my first entry, eto ang story ni M as requested by Cherryl (with minor edit).

Part 1 April 13

gays,

for those who are wishing (and praying) na mag-end na kami ni A,
i believe the universe has just semi-granted your wish.
semi-granted kasi A and i are still ok,
except he's migrating to canada with his family soon.
nag-submit na sya ng resignation letter the week i left for japan.
today lang nya sinabi sa akin kasi ayaw pa nyang maguluhan sa decision nya.

nag-file daw sila ng application noong 2002, and last march lang daw na-approve.
hindi daw nya na-expect that the canadian government would require him
to be physically in canada before june 2009, or else lose the citizenship.

nag-terminal leave na sya and last day na nya sa office this friday, april 17.
he tried to extend to next year yung deadline pero di na daw pwede.
mauuna sya don with his dad and susunod next year yung brother and mom nya.
he's still trying to convince his wife to give up their life here in manila,
and kung maging successful sya sa pag-convince, susunod sila ng baby nya don.

we still have a planned trip to phuket this july and sabi nya,
once he gets his residence card, he will return to manila this july so we can take the trip.
but i told him never to make any promise he can't keep.

wag daw ako maging malungkot dahil hindi naman daw sya mamamatay,
kasi nasa canada lang naman daw sya.
pero parang ako ang mamamatay sa binalita nya ngayong araw na to.

Part 2 - April 14

don't worry guys (side comment: as if nagworry ang lahat! chux), nag-usap kami ni A this morning.
2 hrs kami nasa starbucks kanina.
sabi nya, wala naman daw syang feelings for me.
i was nothing but a friend to him, like any other officemate.
sabi nya lahat daw ng ginawa nya, walang malisya.
na-shock ako with what i heard.
i asked him if he's saying these things for me to move on easily.
hindi daw, yun daw talaga ang totoo.

during lunch, i told him that i'm hurt with the things he said,
although i have no regrets sa nangyari sa past.
ganon lang pala ako sa kanya, and yet he did those things for me.
and then he explained, he's not the type na masalita or ma-explain.
he was insinuating that i should read between the lines.
he told me na ako ang una nyang sinabihan na magre-resign na sya,
except for his team lead and manager.
sabi nya, what does that tell you?
sabi ko, sabihin mo sa akin directly so i'll understand.
sabi nya, he can't say it kasi hindi sya ganon.
sabi ko, ako na lang magtatanong -- iba ba ako from the rest?
sabi nya, ang kulit ko daw, but the answer is yes.
and that made all the pain and hurt worth it.

i'm praying that things will now get better from here on.