been having these thoughts a la bridget jones...what if i grow old alone, die and then be discovered a few weeks later by some alsatians/wild dogs? shit. that's depressing...but if that's my fate...hay, e di better accept it na lang right. but one thing is sure, i wont marry someone just for the sake of marriage...or, i can always ask some fellow singles to live with me...or get myself into some sort of a home for the aged...dang.

onga pala...shiela...move on!

lani, musta na?

cherryl+australia

click on this link to get info on aus immig/working visa:http://www.immi.gov.au/...i think it's pretty easy because you can actually take some test/questionnaire or submit some stuffs online...havent accessed the site yet, ill try within the next few days once i have time...

marlon+japan (or u.s.?)

read that japan is planning to up its immigration coz of its aging society...grabeh na, i think this is good news for you...pero try mo ring kumuha ng u.s. visa! kahit tourist lang tas sama ako tas we'll look for a job dun...ives is gonna do it (she's leaving on the 17th of feb)...pati rin si ross, sa april naman! ako naman i think ill apply for a visa in the mid/latter part of this year...still weighing the risk e...unless samahan mo ako, game ako agad! ;D

safeway

i know someone who just resigned from ibm...he's a software engr or something...needs help daw in looking for a new job...tas naalala kita...meron pa ba jan sa inyo?

holy week trip

ill update you on the cost for our viet+cam+thai trip... i have a colleague who traveled from viet to cam to thai to laos by bus! grabeh noh! parang na-excite tuloy ako!!! she told me she'll give me details some time this week...mejo hectic kasi week namin ngayon after our week-long holiday...shempre, work piled up big time!

mekong tour

went on a tour further down south...it was interesting, not so much because of vietnam but bec of the ppl i was with...

i think i already know a lot about the vietnamese life kaya mejo di na ko nagulat sa mga kinikwento ng tour guide namin...pero merong couple of things that i really find strange:

1. mekong river

di ba there's this big river that flows from tibet to myanmar to thailand to cambodia to vietnam (not sure kung tama ang sequence ha!)...yung mga tao sa provinces do all sorts of things sa river: fish, market (meron silang floating market) etc...pero on top of that, ppl also use the river for bathing and washing clothes/dishes etc coz they believe that the river is clean because it alternates between low and high tide twice a day (ie six hrs low, six hrs high, six hrs low etc...)! at, they have this big earthen jars wherein they store rain water for drinking! it's clean daw kasi. hala na.

2. brides for sale

i was told by our tour guide (and the malaysian and korean men i was with) that taiwanese men like to "buy" viet wives because they are hardworking! i was totally enraged...pati yung south african girl nagulat...kasi bakit nila kelangan ng hardworking wives? sagot naman ng malaysian, "to help in the house and the biz"...told him, "what they need is a maid."...learned also that these girls have different "grades" and their prices are dependent on these...ie, a low-quality wife would sell at around USD700 (to be paid to the matchmaker or in some cases, to the girl's family); a high-quality wife would be at USD5,000...and their definition of a high-quality wife? someone educated, pretty, hardworking...girls get themselves in this mess due to economic reasons, pero naku naman, if that is the case, you can always get a job noh...lech

that got me to thinking rin why ppl "buy" wives...isnt it that we marry because we love someone and we wanna grow old with them? chuks. sabi ng tour guide/malay/korean, these are mostly ppl who are old na kaya they do not have enough time to look for wives...naging busy sila siguro sa biz ng kabataan nila or talagang wala sila nahanap na, or naiwan ng asawa...pero di ba if it's something as important as marriage, dapat u should spare some time to look for a suitable partner! hay naku, kakaibang culture, kakaibang perspective...

i also wanna talk about the ppl i met during the tour...funny how we would ask about where we come from, what we did for a living etc but we never asked for our names...i guess it's because we knew we will never see each other again...or maybe to these ppl, names arent that impt coz they were here simply to enjoy the trip and not forge any long-term relationships...

start tayo sa:

1. two fifty-something french women and a viet woman

they didnt speak a word of english so they never really mingled with us. they had with them an equally old vietnamese woman who spoke french...they basically kept to themselves...so la akong kwento about them

2. two twenty-something french women

when they were not bashing english ppl (ie how english ppl are so snobbish, they never even try to speak french when they are in a resto in france), they would tell us abt their life stories...one was a career-driven girl and worked as a marketing director in viet-camb-laos for a vaccine company (aventis ata)...one was a free-spirited english-french teacher who used to be a receptionist at a hotel...isip ko ok pala maging french ano, coz a lot of ppl wanna learn french...so pa-travel-travel ka lang kung saan may kelangan para magturo...too bad di ganon ka-substantial globally ang filipino language...

3. korean guy (38 yrs old daw sia)

the group was kindda worried about this guy coz he speaks really bad english...tas he traveled alone pa so pedeng mawala sia...anyways, he is soo rich he doesnt do anything but travel and scuba dive kaya he looks 25 yrs old lang tuloy...been to the phils four times para mag scuba dive...fave nia puerto galera and he thinks that cebuanas are really pretty...before he went to vietnam, nag-cruise sia ng china (beijing etc)...tas after vietnam punta daw sia cambodia at thailand...we were teasing him why he wasnt married...sabi nga ng isang south african girl, "u'r not into boys, are u?" sabi naman nia, kinukulit na sia ng parents nia pero la pa siang plano...di naman sia mukhang bading...

4. 50ish malaysian

he's this married biz man who manufactures switchboards... in one of our boattrips, nakatabi ko sia...mejo bored na ako with the brown-colored river water tsaka mga wooden houses ng mga tao so i read this book by the dalai lama i brought with me...he asked me why i was reading that book...sabi ko naman "for fun!" chuks...sabi ko ive read some books on spirituality ie celestine prophecy...sabi nia, "you know that a european traveler i was with in cambodia (galing kasi sia dun) told me to buy that book?" how serendipitous. chuks... anyways, from there, he told me that he was a spiritual doctor (he can see auras and heal ppl) and that he travels to do research on religion (nepal etc)...he told me stuffs about spirituality na mejo familiar ako so oks lang...eh thing is, he told me that i have this "hot" energy within me na di daw malabas...sabi ko, "maybe it's bec of the temperature?" told me to do yoga to get rid of the "heat" otherwise baka magkasakit pa ako...at, humingi ng notebook ko at binigyan nia ako ng yahoo address nia para email ko daw sia just in case may problema akong di ma-solve...! at sinulat ang three tips for me: think positive thoughts, do yoga, go the spiritual path/do good deeds...anyways, i guess there's no harm in following his advice so magyoyoga na rin lang ako...

5. american guy (mukhang 29-30ish, typical american: blond/blue-eyed, mejo cuteee actually)

he was not part of the group sa tour but met him when i was having dinner in this resto where our bus dropped us off on our last day...i was askin no one in particular, "is this self-service or what?" tas biglang nagsabi sia, "nope." he was seated in the table next to mine. tas biglang nagkwento "in here, you have to be very patientttt." smile naman ako sabi ko "thanks for the advice." chuks....anyways, he asked san ako galing (usual tanong dito) etc...told me he's from texas, tas he has been in vietnam (hanoi and the other key cities) for like two months now...he's this research guy kasi who is looking for race- track markets...sabi nia, mukhang vietnam ay di market for cars (obviously)...so, he will recommend to put up race tracks for motorbikes...kasi he has seen some ppl daw racing sa streets altho bawal...so defnitely, may market for racing dito...next stop naman nia is korea daw...pero uwi muna sia ng u.s.

6. two south african girls (white) my age altho mas mukhang matanda shempre

kakatuwa ito sila...they've been able to go around the globe thanks to the english language...they are currently based in taiwan (which for them is the ugliest place they've been in...at, di nila kilala ang f4! meron silang binanggit na boy band, p156 ata, sabi ko di ko kilala yun)...sabi nila kasi native speakers sila ng english (aside from their dialect, african) at caucasian sila, kaya meron silang ganong opportunities...kaya ayon, nakapunta na ng bali, thai, egypt etc...max 2 yrs sila sa isang country...next nila atang pupuntahan is new zealand...kwento pa nila na sweldo nila is like from 1600-3000usd (di na nahiya!)...tinatanong nga rin yung korean kung may pera ang mga english teachers sa korea...mukhang meron so i think pupunta rin ang mga yun sa korea rin para i-scan ang english-language teaching environment at para mag-ski na rin...

kung caucasian-looking pala tayo, we can do the same...pero ano kaya competitive edge natin so that we can go to a foreign land and work then alis after two years and still be secure na meron pang isang country na kelangan ang service natin...

7. two aussies

isang gay at isang girl na mejo may pagka-anti-social...so kebs sa kanila...

sia sia, dinner na ko....kelan wedding ate vane??!!!

btw, may friendster na rin si tita lulu!
at ako ang only friend nya!
chuks!

update pala from tita lulu:

date:jan 22, 2004
subject:updates!!!!!!!!!!!!


Carlos Miguel:

I know...know.you miss updates but what can i do? i dont have something to tell you until recently. Remember Carlos Miguel--- filchinese friend whom i have fallen in love with? dont wanna mention it here caused im really worried if this message would be missent to the highschool egroup. anyway, i think all of you know that i told myself in my last update that i need to move on,etc etc. much to my consternation, its not that easy especially when i go home to legazpi. I know that he has been dating someone (or more) and he even mentioned that he is into a serious relationship cause he's not getting any younger. i've nothing against that...he's a perfectly normal guy with needs and wants (chuks! sexual?). i was so much looking forward to the holiday season cause i get to see him. ahhhhhh....... i forgot to tell....this september i went home and i textd him that i was in legazpi and when can he treat me out (charing!!!!!!!!). he said he just had operation on his leg because of basketball chuva. me naman, i believed him (love nga di ba?) so twas okay with me. unfortuantely (or is it fortunately?) i saw his car while i was driving. i know his car plate no---WMK something and i saw him (or is it my overactive imagination?). he was wearing sando pa nga and that was around 7 am. i was a bit shocked (di lang a bit ha really really shocked). i couldnt believe it. the first thing that immediately crossed my mind was that probably he was on his way to the basketball court or the airport to jog. leg injury ha.........i coudnt believe that he would go to such extent as to lie to me just to avoid me (feeling ko kung hindi pa sabog mundo dahil sa US-Irag war, sasabog pa la ng that time....chuks!!!!!!!!) how could i be so stupid....right??????? with that incident, i didnt text him ever. since i got back to manila, i have been texting himbut just forward messages ( di ko matiis eh, you cant blame me ha....im human----not an animal chika!!!!!!!!!!!1 i make mistakes and can be so stupid sometimes in love-----love ba talaga??????? basta yun na yun...) never did he replied.....of course, its easier said than done----moving on, forget..... etc but its that hard.....

december: days after i went home, i textd him re when can he treat me out....i was really hungry then and wanna go out....he said he was full and asked for my landline no. we talked over the phone.....and i asked him about this girl ( itago na lang natin siya sa pangalan maria mercedes...chuks!!!!!!!! say, parang telenovela ang aking kuwento..take notehindi ako ang kontrabida ha.............) i asked him about maria mercedes, etc......and kung sila na.....matagal, pero inamin na rin niya...... sila na....asked him since him and he answered secret...(letse!!!!!!!!!! pa-secret secret pa ha feeling mo artista). believe me while i was talking to him i was gritting my teeth and tumitirik mata ko ha sa inis sa selos, sa sakit (say!!!!!!), all of the above ba. honestly, i wasnt that hurt...twas only until now (as in this january ha that everything sinks in----he has a gf and probably its for keeps and guess kung saan ko na-realize yan??? sa simbahan last week...kaya siguro ko pinaparusahan ng diyos....). so while we were talking someone yata texted (and i dont need a genius IQ to know that twas his gf) so he told me i'll call back,etc. i know its impossible kasi twas his gf siyempre matagal usap yan di ba.

The next time i saw him was in our high school reunion. He got fat and was kindda sloppy(usually di-tuck in pa yan di ba, minsan pa nga muscle shirt). We didnt have much opportunity to talk kasi he was with the guys and i was with the girls ( girl po ako although maraming di naniniwala.... saaaaaaaaaaaaay!!!!!!!!!). His buttons on his shirt was open and i was feeling bored so i suddenly looked at him and saw his unbuttoned shirt ( ewan ko ba di na ko makatingin sa mata niya...pagibig ba ito o ano???????). believe me, i felt desire----this intense desire to kiss and caress his neck ( nasobrahan yata ko porno movies chuks!!!!!! or nakulangan---which is it?) i sont know cant explain ba...eh yung neck pa naman niya maraming nunal and namumula mula diyos ko ilayo mo ko sa temptation ( too late). i dont know exactly what happened to me at that time....probably repressed or stressed or depressed (chuks!!!!!!lahat na ng "ssed") alam bniyo ba the feeling na near yet so far.....he was so near (asin two seats apart lang kami pero hindi ko man lang mahawakan....ching!!!!!). After the reunion, he asked me "oh kumusta ka na? told him tumataba siya and suggested na baka hiyang sa gf niya...he agreed kasi his gf tumataba rin (ha!!!!! buti nga) thought to myself maybe because palaging lumalabas or too much sex...saayyyyy.exercixe yun di ba....). asked him when can he treat me and then he told me to just text him said ok and we parted (parting is such sweet sorrow aka juliet or romeo di ko alam nalilito na ko sa pagibig chux!!!!!!!!ano baaaaaaaaaaaa...). texted him again a few days later but he didnt reply.....sabi ko baka lang (baka nga di ba) may problem with globe connection so texted him again......alas!!!!! di rin reply.....at that time i felt and realized that he was really gone for good...(tang!!!ngayon lang na-realize di ba.....)tanga.....siguro but we tend to make excuses for things that we dont like to see........it was blatantly obvious or maybe i justified lang his actions.....but the truth was staring at me......(di ko makit masyado kasi malaki nga ilong ko di ba tsaka medyo sarat----im not fishing ha....). kaya nga nag-friendster ako (chkuks!!!). Now, i dont know still depressed (ayokong magpaka-ipokrita) but i know that there is still hope.....aslong as he's not married there is still hope...pero napapagod na rinko kahiihintay.....pretend to be a sympathetic listener and a good friend when all i really want is to go beyond the bounds of our friendship....(chuks!!!!!!! isang gabi lang solve na ko........whatever!!!!!!!). maybe its about time to close the final chapter about me and carlos miguel........siguro hanggang telenovela na lang talage kami............. hehehehehhe.....

disclaimer (again): the incidents mentioned do not exist inthe imagination of the writer nor are characters product of the author's imagination (no matter how gorgeous she is----chuks!!!!!!ano kinalaman nun? ). they are based on facts experienced by the author herself (much to her disgust). any comment would be greatly appreciated and should be forwarded to her email address to somehow (if not entirely to cheer the author up (charing!!!!!!!!!!!)

hi everyone!
the goddess of eternal beauty is back!
2004 is like so busy for me!
super daming work, as in, no breakfast na,
kasi pagdating ko sa umaga, work fatale!
the only break i get is pag nag-down ang system.
plus i have 2 term papers this sem,
plus a thesis proposal.
grabe na ang pag-usad ko nito.
chuks!

thanks pala for the books, kuha ko na from lukring,
although di ko naramdaman ang siddharta
dahil hiniram agad ni lukring.
for the past 3 saturdays ko na yata kasama sya,
panood-nood ng movie with you, shiela, oche.
tomorrow naman e sana sumama si tita lulu
dahil miss ko na sya!
nabasa nyo ba ang ma-dramang email nya kanina?
muntik na akong maiyak... sa inis!
ang martir ni tita lulu, grabe!

anyways, may plans ka ba for holy week?
i think i can vietnam it, for one week,
that is, kung ok lang sa yo na makitira dyan.
sagot ko ang plane ticket, pero sana pagdating dyan,
super sagot mo na ang lahat pls!
try ko nang makaipon, as in right now!
chuks!

uy ano na australia natin?!

marlon! nakita kita kanina sa ym ng paalis ako for work...anyways next week buong week "tet" (lunar new year) dito...walang pasok...grabeh...have time na to go around.......

marlon...hope u got the yrbook and siddharta...gave them to cherryl...pakibigay ulit ng link ng friendster mo, i-view ko tonight ang recent boylet mo...

last night allen called...natakot ako kasi pinapapunta nia ko dun...sabi ko sia na lang punta dito eh kaso sobrang busy daw with autoshow and stuffs..sabi nia sia naman magbabayad ng plane fare, tirahan etc...pinapa-apply na ko ng us visa...anyways, sabi ko ill think about it...whachathink? ayun lang...sige, ingats...

leche daming work dito.