please continue...
chuks!

date:27, Jan 2003
>
>hello! sory juz email now been very bc.anyway, have anoder chika for u re
>wat hapend to my xmas holiday.pwde itago natin sa ibang panaglan yung mga
>guys mention ko b4, let's kol guy #1 Ivo (yung benta ng forever living) and
>guy #2 Carlos Miguel(my crush sinc high skul frend ko na nagayon) oh di ba
>filing ko telenovela buhay ko!chuks!
>
>IVO: iv nver heard anyting from dis guy lately so filing ko i was right all
>along, he was juz out to sell me forever living products (ka-cheap-an di
>b!) but i admire his perseverance he rily wants to be rich.ds january he
>textd me kesyo ano dw mgandang pangalan for a charity chuchu.so moi kebs
>ko na lang baka missent lang ang weird kc ng text so i tot txt na namn kc
>may kailangan siya sa kin (wag naman sana).or maybe, nanadyan gf from the
>states umuwi for the holidays so dedma niya ko.it's ok naiinttindihan
>ko(martyr di ba!)
>
>
>CARLOS MIGUEL:pag uwi ko bicol txt ko siya na nasa legp na ko and he
>replied daan siya hws namin. so moi bihis ko agad and nagpaganda(sad ting
>is di nako kasingganda as b4 andami ko ng pimples so sad no chux!) hiram ko
>blouse ni ann (my sister) tapos ayun dumating siya nagmiskol eh nasa taas
>fon k di ko rinig fon wnt down coz may full length mirror dun mas makikita
>ko beauty ko.sad na namn kuwentoi kc tungkol sa ex na naman niya (in
>fairness ma-memorize ko na luvlyf niya wid maritz ha-his ex).pero alam niyo
>ba filing ko na naiirita ko tumitirik mata ko sa inis sawang-sawa na ko
>kakikinig luvlyf niya ha.eh siyempre frend ko i nid to listen and
>understand (in the hope na mapapansin rin niya ako).d worst ting is,
>napansin niya pimple ko bakit da (my god ha kaht ako d ko alam y dami ko
>pimples by then) actually, lumipat ko sofa para magkaharap kami sabi niya
>tabi na lang kami (ok watever gusto lang ko tabihan di b?). dat tym i was
>craving for lasagna told him dat i shud have askd him to bring me lasagna
>eh di ko naman cinab.anyway, lumbas nalang kami he wanted to watch side a
>kc may concert then eh ayoko sawang-sawa na ko sa side a kaya pala nandun
>yung girl(huever she is) parang mu yta sila pero aaw sabhin ng girl sa
>frends watever? is hapening betwn dem (arte niya ha)sabi ni carlos miguel
>mestize daw yung girl (buwist kung hind jackie forster, lea salonga or
>donita rose kamukha tutuo ba yan)sabi ko (being the gud frend i am) na i
>want to mit her.honestly, di ba kahit di mapunta skin si Carlos Miguel at
>least mapunta siy a sa nice girl kaya gusto ko kilatisin and gusto ko rin
>makita kung ano nakita niya dun na wala ko.sb niya mas okey kung nandun ako
>para dw hindi halata para sbhin kasama ko siya d duda frends ng girl na
>sadya ni Carlos yung girl (kc nga di ba ayaw ipaalam girls tungkol sa
>kanila ni Carlos) prang my god! napaisip ko hanggang second fiddle na lang
>ba ko? for how many years iv tryd to undrstand, to wait but.....sabagay if
>you luv the guy ur willing to waid ryt?(clear ko lang hindi ko siya luv ha
>bka ano isipin niyo).
>anyway, bigla nagbago isip ni Carlos ayaw na niya ipakiilala yung girl
>(hah! filing ko di naman maganda yung girl nahihiya siguro si Carlos)so
>punta na lang kami coffee shop (marlon,lani,etc remember yung oinuntahan
>natin mukhang startbucks? b4 dat gusto niya s isang place (but its smaller
>and more intimate) sbi ko sa kanya wag na lang kc sabih ng iba nag-date
>kamik (chuks?!gustong-gusto ko naman). may cnb pa siya na kespo bkt dw s
>probinbsiya pag kita magkasama kayo sabih date kami (ngik!!!!!!ikinahihiya
>ba ko?sa gandang kong ito?) anyway, pag pasok namin order na ko for both of
>us tapos binigay sakin pera sa harap ng cashier di man lang sinekreto
>filing ko tuloy bayaran ko disente lang damit chuks!!!kainins siya di man
>lang nahiya sbhn iba wala ko pera (which is true pero ayaw ko obvious)so
>upo na kami hinatian ko siya ng lasagna and hinatian niya ko chicken canoli
>(di ba pa-swit ko in fairness swit talaga ko)d niya nagustuhan order ko
>iced tea for him so twag niya waitress eh di ba wala dun waitress na
>umiikot so sobi ko inumin niya iced tea ko (kahiya naman siya nagbayad nun
>so i myt as well offer him GMRC ba!)alam miyo ginawa?ininom iced tea ko (oh
>ci ba parang nag-kiss kami nun)comment p niya masarap dw yung iced tea
>ko.so ayun umalis na rin kami.kailangan umuwi siya kc wala tao hws nila
>nasa mla parents and sis niya.hay naku pag uwi ko as in d ko maka2log i
>kept tinking of d incident over and over agen (chungaks ko noh).after xmas
>ko na siya nakita i was wid my sis and her frends d same place kita ko siya
>umalis agad kc may pupuntahan.in fairness, natakot ko baka sabihn ang landi
>ko may katabi ko guy frend ng aking sister but, on the other hand, at least
>pwede niya isipin i can be attractive to other guys(kahit di man s kanya d
>ba).
>DEC 27:shower party high skul frend ko we met earlier at the mall after
>videoke kami(wala kc macho dancer makuha kami masyado late na so i tot baka
>fully booked mga macho dancers pag holiday no chux)i txt carlos punta siya.
>so moi daan p hws para sundo sis ko and at the same time para magchange
>costume (mahirap na baka dumating siya kailngan palagi ko maganda).dumating
>siya wid anoder high skul klasmeyt itago natin siya s pangalan angelo(chuks
>parang telenovela n talaga). pag dating gutom na ko so kain ko kht nandun
>siya pero pakonti2 para di halata matakaw ko kc talaga gutom na ko.tumabi
>siya skin kuwento2.actually, kakaiba siya dat tym.di ko alam kung dahil
>lasing lang(wag naman sana huhuhuhu)kc hawak ng hawak sa nape, kinikiliti
>ko,(ako naman pa-demure naman)hinihila yung belt ko bkt dw suot ko yun(yung
>usong belt ngyon na western).in all honesty, nahihiya ko so high skul
>frends ko dat tym baka sibhn malandi ko eh siya yung kakaiba.tapos
>kumakanta siya and then biglang ask siya frends ko sumayaw depende dw sa
>song since wala kami macho dancer siya na lang di ba.bigla tinugtog
>bikining itim niyaya ko sumayaw nakakahiya of all the songs....eh siyempre
>being the conservativ filipina i am(to be continued.....)

by:
gorgeous (sabi nia)

belinda vakler,

di mo naman sinagot mga tanong ko about work mo e!
huhuhuhuhuhuhuhuhuhuhuhuhuhuhuhuhuhu!

anyways, sabi na nga bat may mabuting patutunguhan yung kay lani.
sabi ko kay cherryl, kahit na super whine si carioca about ex-gf,
pwedeng it's his way of showing lani na he's comfortable with her.
na kahit intimate details, willing syang i-share with her.
so i think yang valentine's date na yan ang ultimate lands moment nya!

*giggle*

happy rin ako kay ate vanessa, at least she has found the man of her dreams.
it might be cherryl's nightmare, pero for her, she's living her dream.
yung tungkol sa finances nila, it's not our concern, or even cherryl's.
if she's that decided about marrying rovil, then let her.
i'm sure naisip nya naman yung possible consequences of her action,
and yet, she's willing to bear them all!
you go girl!
chuks!

e etong si shiela anong problema naman?
bat di nagpaparamdam ang beauty-queen-trying-to-be-kopra-queen?
parang ayaw ko na tuloy syang dalhan ng pasalubong dahil di umiimik.
chuks!

wala naman masyadong latest sa akin, ganon pa rin.
except more life lang siguro than past weeks.
email pa rin kami ni teacher regnar, inaayos ang plans.
magkakasalisi kami sa japan, so baka sa manila na lang meet siguro.
i dunno, i'm not that enthusiastic in meeting him,
lalo na noong nakita nya ang pics ko, sabi nya, "ang lusog-lusog mo".
boo hoo!

yung other guy naman, nagparamdam na at nag-explain chuchu.
sabi ko sa kanya, no need to explain, ano naman kinalaman ko sa kanila diba?
i'm also over that, kung san sya masaya, edi good for him.
natanong nya kung friends pa rin ba kami, sabi ko, why not?
i mean, wala naman syang ginawa mali, lalo na sa akin.
so nothing would change with how we deal with each other.

kung sa work ko naman, eto waiting pa rin.
not that interested in finding an answer now, i'm just trying to enjoy every minute now.
pag-uwi ko na lang sa pinas iisipin kung san ako kukuha ng pambili ng food.
chuks!

hahaha...oo nga...we're all growing up...di bale...punta din tayo ng leyte...meron naman akong 2 trips to the philippines na free annually...so uuwi din ako...kelan ka pala balik? sana this february...we are planning to spend the vday in a hotel with bath tub and swimming pool so we can de-toxify...speaking of vday...ang lani humaba ng buhok...she was invited by carioca to watch the boyz2men concert this feb 14! say! o di ba ang lola nananalo...si cherryl naman...grabeh she told me that ate vane is getting married his december! kay rovil! ate vane nga daw is scouting na for apartments...ay naku, cherryl feels bad kasi mukhang ang bubuhay sa magiging pamilya nila ay si ate vane...i told cherryl naman, siguro naisip na rin ni ate vane yun...tas ok lang sa kanya at baka happy lang talga sia with the guy...tas i remembered the concept of synergy in business... your personal contribution is based from your talents and resources...ergo if you have more, you contribute more...i dunno, pero at least ate vane will have someone beside her when she wakes up in the morning...

kanina pala...i went wall climbing sa river banks...with my mba classmates...bat di natin nagawa yun?...mura nga lang e...unlimited time, P150 plus rock shoes pa yun...ang saya...pero i found out that i have a weak upperbody...and that i'm doing the climbing all wrong...strength ko concentrated on my upper body...next week ulit kami...

ano bago sa yo? yung svi nag rerecruit sa u.p. ah...ibig sabihin nun...the comapny remains strong...or baka dahil sa dami ng pinapirate ng safeway...naubusan sila ng tao?

belinda,

when i first heard na may offer ka to work in vietnam,
the first thing na pumasok sa isip ko is,
paano na ang leyte trip this coming summer?!
chuks!

to tell you honestly, natuwa ako nang malaman ko yung news.
i mean, bihira lang naman kasi na mabigyan ng opportunity like that.
some people would do anything to be given that privilege,
tapos sa yo, parang ang easy lang ng pagkaka-deliver.

it's true, working abroad is a very different experience.
i won't say na i'm more mature, but definitely i learned something.
it's enlightening in the sense that you'll meet more people,
be immersed in a culture a little different from yours.

don't mix in love with your decision to pursue this or not.
think of this as a one-time life experience, just like finding your one true love.
this might be the vlad of your career, the work opportunity that got away...

of course, i was saddened by your news,
wala naman kaming ibang kakilala sa leyte, wala kaming matutuluyan,
baka di kami papasukin ng parents mo sa bahay nyo.
chuks!

btw, ano pala ang arrangements ng work mo?
i mean, when will you be leaving and for how long?
meron pa ba silang opening for programmers?
chuks!

natutuwa ako sa group natin kasi we're all growing, moving on.
being the trendsetter that i am (and will always be forever and ever),
3 na ang nag-a-abroad sa atin, followed by shiela, and now you.
tapos si lani, may licence na as a teacher.
si cherryl na lang di pa nagmu-move on, in-love pa rin kay francis.
chuks!

Vietnam

Hi marlon…this is my promised blog on Vietnam…why in a month’s time I will fly towards that war-ravaged country way poorer than ours…in my previous semester, I enrolled in a class called marketing research…I wasn’t too excited about it, I just signed in for lack of anything better to take (my other option was investment management, a finance class, which was a no-no because I abhor finance)…near the end of the term, our professor told the class that acnielsen vietnam was looking for market researchers…I being the eternal optimist had an inkling that if anyone of us applied for the position, we were likely to get hired…what with our mba degree and all…so with some of my classmates I emailed and got scheduled for an informal interview with the senior managers of the company…so come January 2, I flew back to manila from leyte...i met with the managers, 2 filipinos (one was gay and the other was a thirty-something woman) at café breton at the podium…I don’t know what nailed the job…I was quite uncertain if I did well because all they did was laugh when I made some comments…the interview was so informal that’s why I was able to inject some jokes and factoids about my life every now and then…for example, one would ask “what do you do in your free time?” oh, I sing in the church choir “so you can sing…” not really, when the notes gets tough, I’d just lip-synch. You don’t need much talent in choral singing,that’s the soloist’s problem… Tas they’d laugh….isip ko nga siguro it’s true, humor is the great equalizer…people will tend to connect with you if you can make the conversation light…then after some days, some british guy (country director) called up twice…then told me they would like to have me as part of their team….

Why I’m crazy about Vietnam

I grabbed the opportunity because first, I find the job interesting plus, that would elevate me to an expat status…this would look good in my resume…second, that might be my only chance of traveling to another country for free…they’d let me stay there and be trained for two months…if I don’t like it there or if I mess up, I can go back home…free of charge with pay pa…third. I would like to get to be immersed in a different culture…fourth, I heard that Vietnam is replete with rivers and mountains…plus the managers said that the country would be a good place to “rediscover yourself.” I was thinking: whoa, I don’t come across would-be bosses saying such philosophical words…isip ko, I think I would enjoy working with such people…lastly, I think this would expedite my dreams of being an entrepreneur…with earnings in US dollars, mas kakaipon ako para sa business natin…hoping!

But sometimes when I think about going there…I do have what I call my pre-vietnam homesickness….huhuhu

Why I’m not so crazy about Vietnam

Yung una siempre…friends…it made me sad kasi I’ll miss our weekly exchange sa eastwood/ortigas/wherever…and I was doubtful whether I’d find friends as good as you guys are…chuks… it sounds trite but it’s true… chuks ulit…but I figured it has never been difficult for me to find friends…so I’m sure I’m going to meet some new friends there…

The bigger problem, one that cherryl unabashedly pointed out to me, was, gulped…what if I never got married…Yuck. I know! It sounds too 60’s-ish…but you have to understand the context of our conversation…that was the time you blogged that went something like…no matter how much we try to tell ourselves that being alone doesn’t mean being lonely…waking up with someone beside you on your bed would make life a lot more ecstatic…yeah, even if you are that far, you still have that impact on the way we think and feel…hahahaha…cherryl asserted kasi that there are so many career-driven people who are very successful yet as morose as the sound of that rusty antiquated train sa espana…pero take a look daw at our parents, even if they are not the richest people in the world, they’re happy because they have each other and they have us children…yeah, I thought it’s true, I have always believed that human beings are not meant to be alone…we are presumably destined to fall in love, have a partner and be happy…and unless we have that, we might (just might) feel a sense of kakulangan thus, we’ll continue to search for that love…maybe the reason why matronas such as madam auring pay their boyfriends P50,000 per month is that they just need somebody to wake up with in the morning… that got me depressed for a while...add to this the fact that the managers warned me not to expect to meet anyone from vietnam…lost kasi mga vietnamese guys…the business book that I was reading that time didn’t help…it stated that work shouldn’t be taken seriously as health, love and family…LOVE daw!…darn…I have good friends, health, family, but love remains oh-so-elusive!!! honestly, that forced me to have second thoughts…but I gathered, if I do stay, there is still no guarantee that I’ll meet someone…god, I’ve spent 25 years of my life in this country and I still haven’t met the one guy I can madly, passionately be in love with…well, except for one, hahaha pero he got away eh…chuks…so I decided that I will push through Vietnam…and thank god, my thinking has been altered to the better…now, there is the hope that there will be someone (sana hindi Vietnamese!)…chuks pero no chuks…I guess I don’t have a choice here…pardon the cliché, pero I just have to have faith, di ba?

belinda,

di ko sure kung anong nangyari, pero lock na sya for life.
pero kebs, may bagong email naman na ako.
tsaka nag-create na ako ng new ym id, so dun tayo chat.
delete the mpasilon id from your list.

kausap ko si cherryl the other day, di nya kinuwento yan.
anyways, magko-comment na lang ako.
chuks!

hindi ko gets bat nya sinabi yung out of his league chuchu.
although tinanong ni ali, he shouldn't have answered it.
alam naman nya kasi na close si ali and cherryl,
so he knew na makakarating kay cherryl yun.
although it's flattering (i'm sure super palakpak ang tenga!),
it gives this impression na he has feelings for her.

there are 2 ways of interpreting what he said.
it could be cherryl's too good for him,
or perhaps, cherryl's not good enough for him.
but since cherryl is our friend, we'd like to think the former's true.
chuks!

his statement complicates things,
kasi now parang wide-open to interpretation na.
to put it bluntly, mas lalong pinapaasa nya si cherryl, which is unfair.
alam nyang he's committed to another,
so parang ngayon, it's up to cherryl to do something,
which is isuko ang bataan anytime soon.
chuks!

anyways, ano tong narinig ko about vietnam?
kwento pls!

panong na lock yung yahoo id mo? grabeh naman yan...

mga tao busy ngayon...si cherryl nasa cloud 9...kasi naman ali told her about the conversation she had with what's-his-face francis...ali asked him why he won't court cherryl...then what's-his-face francis uttered: "she's out of my league." (!)...implying of course that cherryl is too good for him... cherryl naman ay natuwa sabi nia, from now on we should no longer doubt what's-his-face francis' affection for her...kasi it's pretty obvious already...plus, i think he also said that he can't court her coz he's committed already...duh?!...if you like someone too much you won't let commitment to another person get in the way...tsaka anong out of his league?!...to quote shiela it's as simple as what's-his-face francis liking cherryl but not enough to court her....ang arte ng lalaking yun.

how's mark? has he emailed yet?

mga baklush,

bat parang nag-i-internet sa inyo?
may big problem ako, na-lock yung mpasilon id ko.
di ko tuloy ma-access halos lahat ng nasa yahoo,
pati yung ganders_ever na egroup.
di ko sure kung paano ko na ma-a-add yung bagong email ko,
yung marlonpasilon@yahoo.com.
huhuhuhuhuhuhuhuhuhuhuhu!

hey everyone!

may kwento lang ako, medyo positive na ngayon.
nag-email sa akin yesterday yung teacher ko sa jap classes ko,
pero kaninang umaga ko lang nabasa.
wala lang, crush ko kasi yun dati, si regnar.
mas bata sya sa akin ng 1 year yata, pero teacher ko sya.
sa japan kasi sya nag-aral before so magaling na sya mag-nihonggo.
naging teacher ko sya noong time na naging kami ng star circle,
so medyo di ko sya masyado pinapansin, although pwede na.
tapos noong umalis na sya papuntang japan,
na-realize ko na gusto ko pala sya.
pagpunta nya ng japan, nag-email pa rin sya sa akin.
tapos after a while, biglang nawala, middle of 2001.
so akala ko, kebs-kebs na talaga.
well, until this morning.

*giggle*

galing pala sya ng europe tapos kakabalik lang nya ng japan.
tapos hinanap pa daw nya yung email ko,
tapos alam nyang nandito ako sa california.
wala lang, kinilig lang ako, kasi gusto ko sya tapos
may effort pa sya to research my email and san na ako.
how i wish na makita ko sya uli, tapos papatulan ko na.
bago sya umalis papuntang japan, binigyan pa nya ako ng cds.
pero japanese cds, so kinebs ko lang.
pag nagkita kami, wala nang artehan pa.
chuks!

*giggle uli*

hey lani,

that was actually my intention, i-saykolow yung mama mo.
or unti-unti mag-drop ng hints na there are things she doesn't know,
and that you have a life outside of your house.
gusto ko nga send-an ka ng super saykolow postcard,
kunwari about sexcapades mo naman.
chuks!

based sa kwento mo, parang no diff with cherryl.
lagi na lang bang nasa fine line ang drama natin?
pero win ha, bigla kang napapayag makipag-first date.
it's a sign na nare-realize mo na 3 years na lang, menopause ka na.
chuks!

mukha namang enjoy ka kay mark, so go lang.
baka one of these days, sa dalas ng paglabas nyo (sana),
biglang ma-realize nya na ikaw pala ang answer sa questions nya.
maisip nya na bat pa sya nagwa-whine about ex-gf, nandyan ka naman.
o diba, melodrama ang magiging love story mo?
chuks!

ako naman may nagba-bother din sa akin recently.
may isa akong close friend na biglang nagka-gf recently.
dati iniisip ko kung may something ba between us.
kasi kahit lagi sya tinutukso ng friends nya,
lagi pa rin syang sumasama with me.
akala tuloy ng friends nya, baklush din sya.

recently, nagka-gf etong friend na to.
hindi ko nalaman sa kanya, sa ibang tao pa.
di ako makapaniwala kasi super unlikely pair sila.
kilala ko yung girl and i feel na malabo na maging sila.
tapos sabi ng nagkwento sa akin,
inaaabangan daw ako sa ym para mag-explain.
naisip ko lang, bakit at anong ie-explain nya sa akin?
noong nalaman ko yung news, na-bother ako, just dunno why.
pwedeng it's about the unlikely pairing, yung di pagkwento sa akin,
or perhaps, yung idea na someone close to you, may close nang iba.

from bahay to office, may isang major road kaming dinadaanan.
yung ygnacio valley, more or less, 5 minute-ride.
medyo mataas yung road, so kita mo yung mga bahay sa baba.
parang paakyat ka ng antipolo, kitang-kita yung mga ilaw ng bahay sa gabi,
tapos sa kabilang side, may rows ng mga bundok.
minsan super foggy na feeling mo nasa ibabaw ka ng clouds,
dahil yung valley sa ibaba, covered ng fog.
at night, pag tumingin sa ka sa bundok area, always clear ang sky.
kitang-kita yung mga stars sa gabi, tapos yun lang yung light.
it's like the setting of manuel arguelles's short story,
how my brother leon brought home a wife.

every morning and tuwing uwian, kahit na 5 minutes lang,
parang eto na yung highlight ng araw ko.
makita ko lang yung mga stars, mga bahay sa ibaba, happy na ako.
kung may mga bagay akong mami-miss dito, definitely this tops my list.
parang it's the only place here i feel serene.
usually sa beach ko lang napi-feel yun, like puerto galera at night.
etong area na to, kahit 5 minutes lang, source of comfort ko,
na kahit wala akong work or wala na yung ka-close ko,
feeling ko may mga bagay pa rin na magpapasaya sa akin.

*sigh*

marlon,
got ur christmas postcard na, mama ko ngbgay skin so feeling ko nabasa nya un nakasukat dun, me naman patay malisya lng, pero i stl have this weird feeling na me iniisip mama ko, yaan mo na kebs na lng, about allan, un pa rin kme txt txt, minsan nawawala sya minsan bumabalik, about ke mark , malabo yun eh, minsan feeling ko like nya ako minsan i have this feeling na im just one of the girls nya, di sya masyado keri ha pero madami sya girls tlaga, on his birthday he asked me to have dinner with him actually, he had been asking me out na before pa pero i kept on turning him down keso this and that...pero this time sbi ko sige go for it na lng, whatever turn out from this e di yun,sbi ko try k din, so we had dinner, kya lng the whole time we were talking about his exgf, so lost, bigle umikse hair ko, i had this feeling b4 na win-win ako cz he had been making paramdam etc, pero all those kayabangan eh bumalik skin, i realized kse na hang up pa rin sya sa ex nya, sad noh? ego booster ko rin kse un in a way tapos bigla in my face nalaman ko he just needs someone to hang out with, kakwentuhan, or smthing like that, it doesn't mean naman na yoko ng ganun, actually mas ok nga yun, its just that dati feeling ko ang haba-haba ng hair ko, ngayn back to bob cut....so un lng..less complicated ang drama ko kse at least wala gf c mark pero mas malabo naman cz hindi ko naman tlaga alam kun ano ba...anyways about your realizations RE your career and stuff, mas ok sna kun nandito ka para mas mahabang usapan yan...kya lng ur not so eto na lng i think we all go through that, quarter life crisis nga yan...you'll feel ok din after nyan...im not so good at this kse khit ako confused pa rin as to ano ba talaga mangyayari skn or what do i want to happen... pero wish ko lng the we get what's best for all of us..;)

belinda,

that's true, i just hope that there's more to my life than this.
sabi nga sa maid in manhattan, what we do doesn't define who we are.
o diba, kahit super saykolow ng movie na yun, pa-quote pa rin ako.
chuks!

napaka-uneventful ng recent life ko dito sa states.
naging monotonous na, gising, pasok, lunch, uwi, dinner, gameboy or book, tulog.
tapos pag weekend, either tennis or movie.
somehow i feel that i deserve so much better than this.

nakwento ko naman sa inyo na may 30 people na kukunin ang safeway?
may mga nakausap na ang management dito, may offer na sila.
so far, wala pang nag-a-attempt mag-contact sa akin.
not that i'm interested, pero alam mo yung feeling na nasa list ka?
yung may power ka to accept or decline the offer,
unlike in my case now, i feel somehow rejected.
basta gumawa na lang ako ng decision,
na pag walang offer from safeway, i'll shift careers na.
i've always wanted to go out of IT, might as well use this opportunity now.

in terms of love-that-cannot-be, mukhang yun na nga.
i'm beginning to doubt myself, na i won't able to find anyone.
last night, bago matulog, naisip ko lang bigla na would i die alone?
i mean, would i die not knowing what it feels to be loved?
not love from family or friends, but love from someone meant for you.
it's true na i had a boyfriend, once, but it was nothing.
i mean, there was nothing substantial, nothing to cherish.

i'd like to rationalize my fear na it's ok to die alone,
for as long i get to experience a lot of things.
but then, no matter how hard i try to convince myself, it won't get through.
during times like this, experience won't give you any comfort,
but the realization that you've wasted your life doing something else.
nothing can console but a warm body lying next to you,
whispering words of sweet and wicked nothings.

this coming february 7-9, punta kami ni glen sa arizona.
pag pinag-uusapan namin yung plan, small things pino-problema nya.
like paano yung kotse, yung kotse, yung kotse.
sabi ko, ayoko mag-waste ng time thinking about stuff like that.
napaka-petty para pag-isipan, lalo na 1 month away pa.
wala lang, naisip ko lang this morning, is glen = marlon?
although he's worried about a car, tapos ako, my love life,
hindi kaya we're just basically doing the same thing?
worrying about things we shouldn't worry about?

if this is not midlife crisis, i don't want to know what it is.
i'm still young, batang-bata at sariwang beinte-tres anyos.
wish ko lang, nasa powerbooks ako ngayon,
hawak ang book of answers, nang matanong uli:

would i ever find true love?

chuks!

:)

marlon...this message will be short...got the christmas postcard...salamat! ang tanong e...kamukha ba ni howie si champagne?! chuks...san hindi...chuks ulit...oy oks lang naman maging programmer ka ah...it's not the totality of your being...you;re not just a programmer...maraming attachments yan...like programmer na harot... programmer na harot na viajero...programmer na harot na viajero na merong love-that-cannot-be...chuks....basta....will blog later....or tomorrow...i have to go review some stuff....

lani,

super true, parang mtb-eat bulaga-ish, laban-o-bawi,
ang so-called love life ni cherryl.
hindi mo alam kung ano ba talaga,
or kung kelan isusuko (o isinuko) ni cherryl ang bataan.
chuks!

wag mo na lang pansinin si cherryl pag inaapi ka.
baka naiinggit lang yan sa yo kasi licensed teacher ka na,
qualified ka na ngayong mag-hongkong.
chuks!

about miguel, it really makes you think about your life.
i mean, parang ganon lang kabilis, wala na.
to think na lasing yung nakabangga sa kanya.
only shows na our lives are not in our hands.

*sigh*

teka sino naman tong mark carioca na to?
eto ba yung taga-mirriam din na may gf na?
don't tell me isusuko mo rin ang bataan sa kanya?

belinda,

nag-uusap kami ng friend ko sa isang egroup,
tapos natanong ko lang sa kanya, "what's next?".
i mean, hanggang programmer lang ba ako all my life?
or am i bound for something great in life?
if yes, when and how?

sabi nya, ang next daw sa kanya is,
an amazon rainforest lovelife, teeming with wildlife!
sabi ko naman, do we have to give up something,
a compromise with god para makuha yan?
give up my shopping sprees for a love life?
chuks!

with mike naman, twice na sya nag-email.
wala lang, short emails lang.
he hasn't replied to my last email, about work.
mukhang nagka-problem sya sa work nya.
sana makita ko nga sya for more lands moments.
chuks!

:)

lani! happy new year! marlon! i'm so happy for you. grabeh i hope that you get to see mike in the states. so i guess it's true then that he broke up with his gf already. pero why is he moving to the city of sin kaya? is he planning on becoming a dancer? chuks... im already in manila. so that's why i am able to do my email and blogs. boy hunting? i am so not into it! chuks! it will have to wait. im delaying it until i graduate so i can have money to spend on my boytoy. hahahaha. lani. bitin naman e. galing kanino ang gift? if it;s from mark carioca. abah! panalo. si cherryl, hay naku she's obbiously still counting on something happening between her and what'shisface francis. if i know he's just doing whatever it is that he;s doing to cherryl to boost his ego...nyehheheh....la lang nakakainis e...i was hoping kasi that something would come out...a relationshp perhaps...e ang tagal na, wala parin....hanggang text and tawag pa rin...asus! sia sia....goodluck jan...lani...tuloy mo kwento mo...:) cherryl? shiela? nasan kayo?

happy new year marlon!!
Uy super sorrry di kita masyado naeemail, i swearr twice ako nag-email syo, first nun ngamode ako ke cherl kse sinabi nya sa mga ofcmates nya la di pa ko nagkabf...hehe...siguro blessing in disguised yun kse mdyo mode ako nun eh...kun anu-ano sinasabi ko, then second time naman super kahabaan din yun sulat ko,,,kse nagmode na naman ako ke cherl...this time syo ko lang yun inemail pero for some strange reasons eh di na naman nasend and di ko rin nsave so yoko na ulit ulitin...siguro blessing in disguised na naman yun kse medyo mode ulit ako dun so kun anu-ano na naman sinabi ko dun eh knowing you im sure kun nakuha mo yun papsychoanalyze ka naman, hehe.. nways ok na naman kme ni cherl ngyn eh ;-) About the news about miguel super sad!!!I was jst thinkin weeks ago sna makita ko sya kse pupunta me sa megamall area eh palagi ko sya dun nkikita...creepy grabe...mdyo one of the major crushes ko p man din yun...super sad....sayang sya...ok lng skin na di maging kme ever bsta buhay lang sya, say!!! Hay buhay, you dont know kun sino mauuna...about ke Francis ang cherl la ako masyado masabi kse nahihilo nako about that eh...laban o bawi ;and drama ng dalawang iyan eh, minsan positive ang mge signals, minsan malabo, like before new year tama iniinggit ko c cherl na me gft skin c and then pasabi sya na ok lang na walng gft sa kanya kse tinawagan naman sya from Baguio, 4 hours lng naman dw silang na-usap, i dont think that a guy would do that to an ordinary ofcmate or friend, OA na yun sbi ko ke cherl eh!!Super clear message na yun na he just doesn't look at cherl as a plain friend or ofcm81 di ko sure kun pinapaaasa ko c Cherl lalo sa sinasbi kong eto pero opinions ko lng naman yan...as for my own love life mdyo madami-dami ako story ngyon eh di na ksaya d2, oh say!!hehe!! Sa susunod na lng. Uy belated merry xmas and happy new year marlon ha!!!Thank you sa mga gft kht sa pgdating mo p namin makukuha :-)

happy new year everyone!

belinda, this is the 2nd time this year na ginamit mo yung word na creepy,
which in a way is very creepy.
chuks!

yung girl yata na nasa obituary was his girlfriend.
silang 2 yung nasa car, pero yung girl nag-survive.
ipagpasalamat mo na lang lani, na di naging kayo.
it could have been you.

*knock on wood*

anyways, no more sob stories,
don't want to start the year on a bad note.
so share ko na lang ang kilig moment of the day ko.

*giggle*

nag-forward ako ng email kanina, yung two towers.
nasama ko yung email ni mike sa forwarding list,
which means nakuha nya yung forwarded message na yun.
tapos after a few hours, nag-reply sya!!!
nangangamusta lang, tapos nasa manila daw sya.
umuwi daw sya for christmas tapos balik ulit ngayong january.
pero di na yata sa anaheim, las vegas na daw sya.
short lang yung email nya, pero happy kasi naaalala pa rin nya ako.

*giggle*

so yun lang, mababaw pero super happy.
during times like this, i'll take any form of kakiligan.
chuks!

Û

omg....this is really creepy....you know the guy? alam nio bang one of the things that i do in my freetime is read obituaries....and this december 23, i came upon this obituary of a certain carlo miguel cepeda sison (yup, i distinctly recall his name)....it was indicated that he died at the age of 25...naisip ko shets ka age ko...tapos i read na he is survived by families, relatives and a special friend called candice/carol (or somthing, i dont remember anymore)....isip ko wawa naman gurl....and then i did wonder kung ano kaya nangyari sa kanya...minsan lang ako mag-wonder tungkol sa identity ng mga taong nababasa ko dun sa ob section....tapos here you are telling me na he died due to a car accident...! hmmm.