ayy cherryl...not sure if i told you already...anyways, cant promise that the shoestore still has the same model ha? but ill look for one pair for you...

how's your true rob?

saykolow ang pagkahaba-habang entry ha! yun lang!

hey...i've read this...it's from peyups.com...

galing ano...

marlon re vietnam...not sure...prolly til middle of the year next year...so it's ok to come for your bday...

all about eve's by alfred hitchcock right? ive seen a lot of his films here...but never really bought one coz they're classified as "suspense"

ayun, pakicongratulate ulit kay ruby!

PSEUDO-RELATIONSHIPS

She is a 24-year old copywriter. He is an architect. They met and becamelovers in college. They broke up last year but remained to be "friends."They send sweet text messages and he calls her often to make sure she's okay. They still date. They still have sex. They don't see anyone else. It is obvious that they still love each other but when asked about their situation, she doesn't know the real score. Even her friends are in the dark. "Parang sila, pero hindi."

She works in a telecom. He is reviewing for the board. They are in the same barkada. They talk on the phone till 4am. He gives her chocolates, flowers and CDs even when there is no occasion. Their friends are suspecting something. Bakit sila nagsosolo kapag may overnight inuman? Why does he hold her close on the dance floor? Bakit sila magkaholding hands lagi? Sila kaya? "He hasn't admitted anything," she rants. "But I let him hug and kiss me. Parang kami, pero hindi." They work together in an ad agency. After office, they would watch movie, have dinner and stroll at Glorietta. She gave him Harry Potter books for his birthday in exchange for posing as her boyfriend to make an ex jealous. They made out during the company outing in Subicand never talked about it. He said "I love you" once but she wasn't sure if she heard him correctly because they were both drunk then. But one thing she is sure of is her feelings for him. She likes him. And she's assuming that with whathe's doing to her and with her, he likes her, too. There's just one hitch: he has a girlfriend!

She is a 28-year-old virgin. He's a 35-year-old bachelor. Both mountaineers, they became close during their climbs. After a few dates in posh restaurants, he brings her to his condo where they would make out. They have been doing this for months. She wants to believe that "sila na" but then she's not really sure about it. "We don't talk about it but it doesn't really matter," she'd tell her friends. "What's important is I am enjoying this -- whatever it is."

The "parang kayo, pero hindi" stage. Others call it MU or mutual understanding. Pseudo-relationships. Pseudo-boyfriends. Flings. Almostlike a relationship, but not quite. It is a phase where the persons involved are more than friends, but not quite lovers. Puwedeng may verbal agreement, puwedeng wala. One or both of you may have admitted your feelings, possible ding hindi. You just let your gestures do the talking for you. Walang pormal na ligawan na nangyari. Hindi kayo mag-dyowa. Pero sa kilos niyo, sa mga sinasabi niyo, parang kayo, pero hindi.

This kind of "relationship" can happen at different stages for different reasons. It can happen after a break-up. You still love each other, and you want to be with each other but you broke up for a reason. And for reasons that you alone know, ayaw niyo na muna magkabalikan. It can also happen before a relationship, iyong pareho kayong nakikiramdam. Possible din na ayaw niyo munang mag-seryoso kaya kunwa-kunwarian lang muna. Testing lang. Puwede ring hindi puwedeng maging kayo kasi isa sa inyo --usually the guy --may ka-relasyon na. Kaya habang hindi pa siya nakikipag-break doon sa girl (sabi niya makikipag-break siya soon pero di naman niya ginagawa),wala muna kayong relasyon para nga naman hindi siya nangagaliwa kasi "hindi naman kayo."

This pseudo-relationship stage, for a time, can be fun. Lalo na kung naghahanap ka lang naman ng "kalaro." Pero huwag ka lang mag-e-expect na may patutunguhan kayo kasi wala talagang kasiguraduhan. So bakit ang daming nagse-settle sa ganitong set up ganoong hindi naman sigurado kung may patutunguhan?

Iba't ibang dahilan. Puwedeng for fun lang. Puwedeng "buti na iyan kesa wala" or puwede na iyang "pantawid-gutom." Meaning, habang wala pa iyong the real thing, doon muna sa kunwa-kunwarian. For those who are not in a serious relationship, they would think that pseudo-relationship is better than no relationship at all. It would be fun, if all you are after for is that "kilig" feeling.

Aminado naman ako na once upon a time, may mga pseudo-relationships din ako. No commitments involved. For the simplest reason that they couldn't commit, because they were either committed to someone else, or that theyweren't ready to commit.

My rationalization, "okay na iyun, kesa wala." Ang habol ko lang naman, iyong kilig feeling. Iyong merong nagtatanong kung kumusta araw ko. Iyong merong ka-cuddle sa beach outing. Iyong kapag tumunog ang cellphone, mapapangiti na ako dahil alam kong galing sa kanya ang message. Iyong merong laging kasama. Habang wala pa ang the real thing,puwede na itong pagtiyagaan.But then I learned that although it was only a pseudo-relationship, the emotions were real. And usually, in this kind of set up, ang babae lagi ang lugi.

Una, you can't ask him to commit. Since it's not really a relationship,you can't demand commitment from your partner. Ano ba kayo? May K ka nga ba pagpasundo ng hatinggabi? You will always be uncertain about your role in his life. You can't expect him to be always there with you. And if you feel jealous of the other girls, you just have to keep it to yourself.

Ano ka ba niya para magselos?

Pangalawa, what if you fall deeply in love with him? You can't be sure if he feels the same way. Baka nag-a-assume ka lang na mahal ka rin niya. Even if you are dying to tell him you love him, you can't. Because you're not sure if he'll like it. Baka mapahiya ka lang. This stage will always make you wonder where you are in the relationship. Or if there is a relationship at all.

Pangatlo, what if you become attached too much? What if you have invested all your emotions and this man hasn't? What if you remain faithful to him, not entertaining other guys, only to find out that he is seeing other girls?

Isa pang downside ng pseudo-relationships, it is fleeting. When a disagreement sets in, or when one of you gets cold, then that would be the end of it. Unlike in a serious relationship, hindi mo alam kung saan ka lulugar sa isang pseudo-relationship. Wala kang pinanghahawakan. Kasi sa pseudo-relationship, there is no "us." Meron lang "you and me," hindi "us."

Buti sana kung pseudo-pain din lang ang mararanasan mo. Kaso, hindi eh. Real pain. And usually, kahit tapos na ang pseudo-relationship, hindi mo maiwasan umasang one day, may karugtong pa rin iyun. And you will be miserable, hoping to bring back what you used to have, only to find out eventually that the guy is in another pseudo-relationship with somebody else.

Ang hirap, ano? You agreed to this kind of set up for fun and then you'd end up hurting yourself in the process. Pero puwede naman maiwasan ang pain eh. Puwede naman na hindi mo muna isipin ang future and just enjoy the feeling, without thinking of the consequences. But if you are certain that you are going to hurt yourself in the process, kailangan mo mamili. You can be happy and live the moment without worrying what would happen next.

Or you can stop settling with pseudo-relationships and wait for the real thing.When I was younger and in a pseudo-relationship with an unavailable guy,afriend told me, "Sige, kung ayaw mong magpapigil, bahala ka. Magpakasayaka. Pero huwag kang iiyak-iyak pagkatapos, dahil tatadyakan kita." Ang bottom line lang naman, kung magpapasaya sa iyo, gawin mo. Ihanda mo lang ang sarili mo sa consequence. Dahil ang "parang kayo pero hindi" stage ay bihirang nagiging totoo. Usually, hanggang doon lang siya.

Almost, but not quite.

i have shocking-but-not-really news.
ni-confirm ni ruby na 5 months na pala syang jontis.
so lumalabas na pagdating nya dyan, go, go, go agad ang dalawa.
i'm happy for them, especially for ruby kasi daming changes sa life nya.
new country, new work, husband, and baby.
baka december 2005 pa daw sya makauwi or something.

anyways, natapos ko na rin pala ang all about eve.
si bette davis pala ang bida, di ko napansin dahil di ko sya kilala.
tapos nandon rin si marilyn monroe, although short part.
maganda ang movie, in fairness.
and last sunday din pala, natapos ko ang whale rider.
maganda rin ang movie and magaling yung child actress.
deserve nga nya ang oscar nomination.

tapos sad news pala, ni-close ko na ang dollar account ko.
dami kasing bayaran this month, so ni-withdraw ko lahat
para umayos ang aking finances this month.
grabe na, super taghirap na talaga!

thanks pala sa email regarding job opening.
unfortunately, di ako qualified kasi di ako fluent sa japanese.
super basic lang ang alam ko, not even level 4 quality (lowest level).
ayaw mo na ba talaga sa vietnam?
when do you plan to leave your work there?
sana naman by june next year nandyan ka pa,
kasi just like what we did this year, plan ko mag-bday travel uli,
and i'd love to visit vietnam and cambodia.
sisingilin pa rin kita sa promise mong libre ang vietnam stay ko,
basta sagot ko ang plane ticket ko.
say!

btw, last friday napa-attack uli kami sa chico's nina cherryl.
noong una kasama namin si ali pero dumating ang "bf" nya,
so ako, cherryl, oche and kulot na lang ang rumampa,
tapos ni-meet na lang namin si angel (officemate ni cherryl) doon.
si kulot kasi never pa daw nakapunta don, so nagpasama sya.
nag-dinner muna kami, este ako lang pala, sa twist sa libis,
tapos around 11pm, attack na kami don.
ewan ko ba, wala ng effect ang mga ganong place sa akin,
especially after thailand's super wild sex shows.
chuks!

last saturday naman, nanood ako ng menopause sa music museum
starring mitch valdez, nanette inventor, leah navarro and isa pa.
ni-sponsor kasi ng friend ko yung play and nag-ask sya ng help.
instead na penis talks ang pinanood ko, yun na lang,
and medyo sad kasi di ako nagandahan sa show kahit love ko musicals.
di ako masyadong relate sa topic ng show, and di ako natawa.
sana pinambili ko na lang ng computer table ang pera ko,
para naman may lalagyan ang brand new pc ko na nabili ko last friday.
chuks!

since today daw ang delivery ng new pc ko,
napilitan na akong bumili ng computer table yesterday,
and naikot ko ang megamall, metroeast at stalucia for the perfect table.
since maliit lang ang room ko, i wanted a computer table/study desk.
may nakita ako sa mega, pero jusko, mga 5k ang price!
so hayun, napilitan akong bumili ng medyo chakang table for 1/3 nyan.
nag-rearrange tuloy ako ng buong kwarto yesterday,
and akala ko lalagnatin ako sa pawis at pagod.
today pa naman ang consultation ko with sir santamaria for my thesis.

btw, napanood nyo na ba ang the barbarian invasions?
panoorin nyo to, super nice movie, kakaiyak, as in.
atsaka last night, i started watching all about eve, old b&w film.
di ko masyado maintindihan kasi ang ingay ng pamangkin ko kagabi.
super hyper, sarap itapon sa bintana.
chuks!

hello all!

read ruby's email...paki congratulate naman for me...

vietnam

im planning to leave next year...that's why im in the lookout for next steps...

new zealand

ok then...nz here we go! i have a teammate who studied in new zealand...said it's pretty nice there...clean and all...i asked her about the "maori" people, the people in "whale rider"...said they're a minority...nz ppl are mostly whites now...and yeah, they still have a funny english accent...like a cebu-bisaya type of english...

i have a cousin who lives there...i might ask her to see what are our options and whether or not it's best to go there as immigrants...

afterwhich, we can then work on our papers and stuff...

sige, will email you soon...

email pala ni ruby last monday:

> hi friends!
>
> just want to inform about an upcoming event in my
> life. you might be interested to know that IM GETTING
> MARRIED! (here in saipan this december). it's gonna be
> a simple wedding coz we're also planning to get
> married in the philippines. and that's what we're
> going to prepare for. kaso nga lang baka may baby na
> kami nun,hehehe. we wish to invite you sana kaya lang
> malayo tska wala kami talaga budget for this. naisip
> lang namin to start na with our lives together kase
> magkasama na rin naman kami dito. i wish you'll all be
> happy for us. and we also need prayers. thanks!
>
> love,
> ruby

o mga ganders, kelan naman tayo?
chuks!

new zealand

ok fine, mag-new zealand tayo.
say, as if isang sakay lang ng mrt ang new zealand diba?
chuks!

pero if ever new zealand nga, how do we go there?
mag-apply ba tayo as immigrants?
if yes, when tayo submit ng papers and ano kailangan natin?
i found these on the web:

new zealand embassy website
new zealand immigration service

i suggest aralin na natin lahat ng kailangan asap kasi 27 na kayo.
chuks!

sandals

mga 3 saturdays ago dinala ko si nett sa riverbanks.
she brought 1k kasi plan nya bumili ng 1 pair of shoes.
but no, with her 1k, naka-4 shoes sya, super win!
lukring, so i suggest sa riverbanks ka na lang maghanap ng sandals,
para naman mga dvds ko ang mabili ni belinda.
chuks!

house of flying daggers

disappointing ang movie na to.
i understand na exaggerated several aspects ng movie,
pero i was hoping na yung love story ang medyo realistic.
trying hard na maging artistic martial arts movie,
but no, si takeshi kaneshiro lang ang redeeming factor.
although mas love ko na si satoshi tsumabuki than takeshi ngayon.

vietnam

belinda, ano na pala plan mo sa work mo dyan?
are you planning to extend your contract?
what if, as a side plan to new zealand, dyan ka muna sa vietnam,
tapos dalhin mo si cherryl dyan, and hanap kayo ng work?
i mean, just to get a taste of what it's really like to live abroad.
nababato na rin ako sa work ko, and kung matapos ang braces ko,
willing rin ako to venture into vietnam.
whatchatink?

i saw this episode kasi of reporter's notebook sa channel 7, and it featured pinoys working in new zealand. ok naman yung work nila dun. besides, ok din status ng pinoys dun. parang new zealanders are very accommodating sa kanila. i also read this article about this single mom na dun na rin tumira after her husband left her and her kid. ok din daw sila dun. at first, she was hesitant to migrate pero later on naka-adjust sila ng mas madali. besides, maganda ang environment. di ba mas marami nga daw baka dun kesa tao. so ibig sabihin fresh and beautiful ang environment kasi healthy ang mga cows. hehe! saka like what you've mentioned marlon, we can visit the set of lord of the rings pag nandun na tayo. chuks.

uy belinds, may sasabihin ako sa yo. super sad, naputol kanina lang yung sandals na binigay mo sa kin. halos araw-araw kasi kong ginagamit, it's so comfortable kasi. tapos lagi pang hinihiram ni ate vane so ayun bumigay na. in short, papabili ulit ako sa yo. but don't worry, i'll pay for it pagdating mo. gusto ko medyo ganung style ulit kasi comfortable nga. ayoko ng super pointed ha. (daming demands no!?) super favorite ko talaga yung sandals na yun. (sumipsip pa no!)

yun lang muna mga concerns ko. wala na masyado. new zealand and sandals. that's it! chuks!

sa japanese filmfest pala, 6 movies lang ang meron,
waterboys, give it all, hush!, the twilight samurai, juvenile, don't look back.
based sa reviews, lahat sila maganda.
hanapan mo rin ako ng iba pang japanese movies dyan,
and sana maitakas mo papuntang pinas.
chuks!

gusto ko mag-collect ng movies ni satoshi,
atsaka ni asano tadanobu, yung kontrabida sa zatoichi.
in fairness, cutie sya sa movie although yun palang napapanood ko.

singapore

ok yata ang singapore, pinaka-accessible sa list of countries mo.
very progressive country, pero anong career natin don?
and don't you think it's too small?
although two trains and two days away lang ang bangkok.
chuks!

canada

di ko bet ang canada, too cold!
atsaka sina kris nag-apply dyan, four years ang waiting period.
although most of the people na kilala ko na nasa canada,
parang mayaman na sila lahat.
si leslie cheung, yung fave chinese actor ko na nag-suicide,
nag-migrate sila sa canada ng lover nya but they went back to hk.

us

happy din ang us, although biggest problem is visa.
super hirap yatang makakuha ng visa ngayon,
and kahit mga national players natin ng golf,
di na-grant ng us visa going to puerto rico for a tournament.

japan

kakanood ng japanese movies recently, zatoichi last night,
parang i'm more in love with japan.
especially pinalitan na ni satoshi tsumabuki si takeshi sa puso ko.
but no matter how in love i am with japan,
mas mahirap makakuha ng visa dito,
and to have a career there, kailangang mag-aral ng japanese.
i'm doing this right now, pero sa inyo, baka di nyo masyado feel.

sa 4 na candidates, singapore ang pinaka-feasible for me.
i'm not so sure with new zealand kasi i have no idea about it.
naiisip ko lang lagi e lord of the rings and yung commercial ng gatas.
chuks!

so ok nga new zealand, pwede ka na magka-work, pwede ka pang magka-boyfriend! win!

actually ok nga ata new zealand...i have a cousin dun...recently lang pumunta...and i heard they really are looking for people kasi ang konti lang nila...pero nandun si elias! scared ako...galit pa yun sa kin...bwahahaah...di naman siguro ganon kaliit ang nz ano?

waaa ang daming choices...decide na kayo...di ako magaling jan e...

hi all!
re: working abroad > in yan sa kin. we should really be thinking about our future. our future husbands, that is. and i believe that our destinies are foreigners. chuks. seriously, gusto ko yan. and if belinda you'll be able to help me/us then please do so. kahit saang bansa pero i prefer new zealand, wala lang parang ang layo, ang hapi at in ang mga pinoy dun ngayon.

re: xmas party > out na ang same old parties i.e. tsikahan with kainan sa hotel. that's so 2003. pero in ang antipolo. di ba dun ang seven suites? ok daw dun. the thing is medyo may kamahalan yata. sana may discount ulit tayo (paging marlon!). im thinking kasi of spending the whole of my 13th month to buy something sa bahay (iniisip ko ref kasi saykolow na ang ref namin) so out of the question ang sobrang gastos sa xmas. but game ako if there is a more practical alternative.

yun lang! :)

halu....countries to consider:

1. singapore
2. japan
3. u.s.
4. canada

basta tell me lang talaga where you want...tas we'll work on going there.

re xmas party...sure...but how about trying something different? hmm...how about a hotel in antipolo or anywhere similar...tipong away from the noisy, crazy city that is metro manila?

re waterboys...naku marlon, im also about to look for it this weekend...will buy a copy for you...am actually looking for another jap movie also, "give it all" ...

re takeshi...napanood mo na house of flying daggers? he's there...pero psycholo ang movie...

hi everyone!

ok sa akin yang abroad chuchu for as long may work tayo.
if ever ba, anong countries ang pagpipilian natin?
say, as if anytime pwede lumipad at parang may passport na si cherryl.
chuks!

but i'm open to the idea although siguro not soon.
last sem ko na sa up sa nov, tapos thesis na lang, ok na ako.
i would like to live abroad with a masteral degree,
para maging susi sa ibang opportunities abroad.
si francis pala niyayaya ako mag-states, gawin nya akong dependent.
kuha kasi sya ng student visa sa february,
and pwede sya kumuha ng dependent, parang alalay chuchu.
nate-tempt ako pero like i've said, may commitments pa ako dito.
ayoko talagang sumabak na di prepared in all aspects,
so sabi ko lemme think about it.
chuks!

last friday pala nanood kami ni cherryl ng jap film fest with glenda,
and natagpuan ko na ang papalit kay takeshi kaneshiro sa puso ko.
super major yummy ni satoshi tsumabuki!
belinda, kung may mahanap kang dvd ng waterboys dyan, pabili pls!

ano pala plan natin for xmas party?
december 23 is a thursday so san nyo plan mag-stay?
mag-hotel ba tayo like last year?
sana dami uli mga small gift items na papa-raffle!
tsaka bring more of the vietnamese silk items!
chuks!

hmm...im thinking about singapore...people from different parts of asia/the world go there to look for jobs...but thing is, we cant chew bubblegum there...hahaha...

im not sure really...you have any suggestions?

i have this offer from my uncle/aunt...i think i already told you about it...they asked me if i wanna go to canada...hayyy dati i dint want to coz i dint wanna let go of my pinoy citizenship...but now, we can have dual citizenship (which made me think, do people who have dual citizenship pay taxes in countries they are in?)...then now, im thinking canada is too square for me...

kayo really...you can suggest...tas if you guys are serious i swear, ill do anything to go whereever...

which reminds me...ivy is in chicago (i told you that already right?)...works as a taek instructor...been there for almost 8 months...said she likes it there coz she lives in the "simple, ordinary" part of chicago where housewives play tennis and children go to school...tas 2 months ago, she found a pinoy bf (and she deeply believes that he's THE ONE)...she's not sure if she wants to go back to pinas coz of the bf...told her the bf shouldnt be the reason for her to stay/leave...her basis should be her happiness/contentment...i dunno, i think she slightly wanna go back coz of her nieces...eh she's almost like a mother to them na kasi...told me ill find living in the states "a breeze" kasi masipag naman daw ako...hihihi...oh well...just wanted to share what's happening with ivy with you...

and yeah, one more...i have a classmate from mba...broke up with the bf then went to the states...still looking for a job there...how brave...

about december...yes, ill be going home! will book a flight on the evening of the 22rd of december (so perhaps we can have an xmas party by the 23rd?)...will go to TAC on the 24th evening...tas will stay there til the 2nd of jan...tas MNL na me til the 9th! prolly by that time, we can plan what to do with our lives...

hi belinds!
oo nga punta tayo ibang bansa! may alam ka ba?
e nasa ibang bansa ka na, san mo pa gusto pumunta?
nga pala, are you coming home sa december? sana! kasi para happy! yun lang!

halu cherryl....good idea yang biz na yan...how bout going to another country...? feel mo? try natin kaya, with marlon?! i think mas maganda pumunta pag may kasama...anyways, isip ko lang...sige ingats kayo...

hi belinds!

ang birthday ni shiela dumating at lumipas parang wala lang. chuks. di kami nagkita last sept. 29, busy yata sya. anyway, greet greet lang thru text. sad no!?

anyway, as for me, tuloy ang retrenchment dito sa ofc. the thing is wala pa kong nakikitang work. gusto ko na ngang patulan yung voluntary retrenchment para may makukuha akong limpak-limpak na salapi (chuks!). ang sad no, half month salary for every year of service. ano yun barya? chuks! di ko na alam gagawin ko. basta if ever itutuloy ko na lang plano ko with my sisters to put up a (very)small business. hay naku!

teka may gagawin pa ko... be back later. dito ko ofc. e :)

hello...san gimmick nio for shiela's bday?

belated happy birthday shielagurl!!!!